Even more than “No Children,” “Oceanographer’s Choice” shows the anger inside the dying relationship of The Alpha Couple.

Track: “Oceanographer’s Choice”
Album: Tallahassee (2002)

“Oceanographer’s Choice” is the bridge between “Old College Try” and “Alpha Rats Nest” on Tallahassee. “Old College Try” represents your final attempts to find something worth loving and your inability to do so. “Alpha Rats Nest” is the euphoria you feel at the absolute end when you’ve decided that it’s over and you don’t even care to pretend to save it. There’s a big gap between those two emotions, so “Oceanographer’s Choice” has some heavy lifting to do.

It connects the other two tracks well because it shows how that one drunken night inspires you to say and feel everything you’ve never let yourself say or feel. The Alpha Couple fires a number of warning shots between each other over the album, but the explosion is in “Oceanographer’s Choice.” It’s arguably even angrier than “No Children” and that is saying a helluva lot. Lines like “I don’t mean it when I tell you // that I don’t love you anymore” are the things you say to a person that you can’t take back. This is the end of the sniping and the arguing. This is the end.

Four lines sum the whole thing up: “I don’t know why I’m so persuaded // that if I think things through  // long enough and hard enough // I’ll somehow get to you.” The narrator is finally honest with themselves and understands that they cannot save this patient. In the right mood the song can fuel a snarling disdain, but it can also inspire profound pity. John Darnielle calls it “another love song, sort of” and it’s all in that last line. The character isn’t blaming the other lover. The character understands this was their own doing: “what will I do when I don’t have you // when I finally get what I deserve?”