https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VyrQCY4rzDg

The title references a movie about how bad things happen to good people, but “Linda Blair Was Born Innocent” isn’t focused on morality.

Track: “Linda Blair Was Born Innocent”
Album: We Shall All Be Healed (2004)

The title of “Linda Blair Was Born Innocent” refers to a TV movie from the 70s called Born Innocent where Linda Blair played an abused teen whose life was destroyed by said abuse and a system that was indifferent to her suffering. It’s somewhat famous for how unexpectedly extreme it was for viewers and for the aftermath of a copycat crime. I’d heard this song hundreds of times before I was ever curious about what it meant beyond a reference to Linda Blair and what I assumed was The Exorcist. I guess it still could be, but the more direct, obvious one is really the point.

It’s not hard to see how John Darnielle could relate to Born Innocent. Whether he saw himself in it or not, it fits the mold of young characters being impacted by forces they couldn’t control. I don’t want to analyze this too much more because the obvious connection is just that, but if you make assumptions beyond it I don’t think that’s really appropriate or the point. It’s just an interesting starting point.

This was one of the first songs written for We Shall All Be Healed, but more than that it’s become emblematic because of how it starts. Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like every press video and interview for the album started with that bit. It’s memorable, as is the surprise rhyme that ends the chorus. Even after you’ve heard it a few times you’ll expect the rhyme with “drown” to be “we’re going down,” but there’s a much different, and potentially darker, meaning behind “we’re going downtown.” I think it means the start of another shopping trip.